Does This Baby

I go back to work, tomorrow. OMG! People have been asking me how I feel about it. My general response is, "Excited, because I really need to start exercising my brain." I didn't realize how dumb I'd gotten this year, until yoga class yesterday. I've been taking yoga on Tuesday nights for the past 4 months. It's been great for my body, and an awesome excuse to leave the house without my baby. However, since I'm going back to work, I figured that I might actually want to spend evenings, after work, with my child. So when I signed up for my next series of classes, I decided to do a weekend class, Saturdays 1pm to 2pm. At the first class we started a little late, because of new registrants, signing of waivers, and payment processing. To my surprise, the instructor went an hour over. I guess it was to make up for the late start. I had only paid for an hour parking, so I was a little nervous when I walked out to the car. The Universe gave me a free pass t...

Everything about childcare is scary; trying to get information on it, registering for it in time, choosing the right option, and paying for it. As soon as Eloise was born, veteran moms were asking me if I had looked into childcare yet. My immediate response was, "Uh... no..." I panicked for a few months, as I researched childcare in my city. Note, Eloise wasn't even 3 months old at this point. Then one day, I was talking to my sister, Nika . She wanted a huge change in her life. I joked that she should just move in with us, and be our nanny, after all , she's great with kids. She paused, and said "Yes." I go back to work February 1st, but Nika started two weeks ago so she can learn on the job, while I'm still around. That means Nika is feeding, bathing, and entertaining Eloise, while I keep myself busy doing stuff like organizing my closet, cleaning the bathroom, and writing my blog. And since this is my birthday week, on top of the regular...

Hubby's mom recently gave us a bottle of Fairy Mist. It's an Aromatherapy spray that is supposed to calm baby's down. I spray the living room in the evenings with it, before Eloise goes to bed. If she's cranky, I'll spray a couple of mists around her. It seems to work. The directions read; From deep within the garden, the Aroma Fairies have gathered this delightful blend to gently calm and soothe children of all ages. Spray mist above your child's head. One day, when Eloise was super upset, crying, crawling away from me, then crawling back to me wanting to be picked up, then pushing me away because she really didn't want to be picked up, Hubby asked how he could help. I said, "Grab the fairy mist." He came into the room, spray head pointed right at Eloise's face, ready to pull the triger. Before he could I yelled, "You're not going to spray it at her face, are you?" He paused. He totally was going to spray her in the fac...

After a week of clearing out the clutter, (there is still a lot of freakin ' clutter in our house), spending time with my parents, hosting 3 birthday parties, (Hubby's was on the 24 th , and Eloise had two parties, one in Victoria and one in Vancouver), and making Christmas dinner, I can't wait to ring in the New Year on our friend's big comfy couch. We're spending this evening with long time friends, who drank the cultural kool -aid, and decided to have kids too. They have an adorable 4 year old, who loves being a big sister to her little sister Emiko , and our little Eloise. My goal tonight is to relax. If I make it to midnight, and manage to drink a few glasses of wine, that'll be a bonus. Last year, I was in bed with hubby, a newborn between us, woke up at 11:55pm, just in time to say "Happy New Year", and fell back asleep. When I think about how this night has changed for me over the years, I smirk and remember that exactly 10 years ago, I ...

As many of you in the blogosphere know, it is hard being clever, and witty all the time. So I'm not, which is why I don't blog all the time. But to all my fans, you know who you are, that keep telling me to blog more because I write funny shit, thank you, thank you, for your kind words, for your support, and for your childlike faith that writing good shit comes easy to me.

I'm totally blown away that my baby is almost a year old. Her birthday is exactly 2 weeks away. Last year at this time, Eloise was still in my belly. Today, she started walking. I look at her sometimes, and ask, "Where the hell did you come from? Who are you? What did you do to my life?". She usually giggles, and smiles a super sinister smile, and I realize that she is indeed, really mine. After all, it was my vagina she came out of.

Hubby drinks too much, coffee that is. He has two cups of coffee a day. On the weekend, he treats himself to a venti first thing in the morning, and then an afternoon tall. Usually, he can handle all that coffee, but this morning he had his tall about an hour after his venti. All high on caffeine, and irritated by the Christmas traffic, he walked into HMV looking for the regular CD section, while pushing our screaming baby in the stroller. HMV had moved all the sections around. The order of things made no sense, not that it ever does. After 20 minutes of walking around the first floor swearing, and sweating, Hubby realized that all the CD's had been moved to the 2nd floor. Before I could point out the elevator, Hubby grabs the stroller at either end, (baby inside) and stomps up the escalator. Shocked, and humiliated that I was married to the Hunk, I followed him up the escalator praying we land safely.